A little something from the past
Tuesday, January 18, 2011I came across this piece of writing that i had written years ago. I wrote it that long ago that i cant remember exactly how old it is, but looking at what i had written and where things were in my life i am guesstimating it must have been about 4 - 6 years ago.
As is stood there reading this, i was transported back to days of yesterday. Those feelings of being alone, of living a lie, of just wanting someone, anyone to see how i was truly feeling.
It's interesting to think about how time and our choices can change things. How completely different my current life is to the life that i was living back then. The opportunity for growth comes in many forms, this one just appears to have been one of mine.
If people were to see me eye to eye with you, what would they say?
Would they say we were in love? Would they say we were meant to be? I'm not sure.
It's amazing how quickly our masks come on, how quickly we learn to adapt them to what's going on around us.
How sad it is that i have lost myself .
Would the younger version of me even recognise me if our paths were to cross?
Would i recognise her?
What happened to her along the way?
Is she alright?
Our parents see us from the time we are born....do they notice that their little girls is gone?
Do they like who they see now?
It's hard to not disappoint our parents - so many things happen in life that before we even know what is going on, things have gotten out of hand, things have turned so dramatically.
I need to make a promise to myself and to others...from now on what they get is the real me.
It's not going to be easy - I know this, but I hope that with God's help He can help me be me to the outside world.
So many times I have disappointed myself, so many times i have let myself down.
Do i have the courage to bring the real me out?
Do i even know who the real me is, to bring her out?
How do i go about finding her, do i try different things until I finally feel that i have found her?
I am not sure.
0 comments